How to talk to teenagers about mental health

Make it ordinary

Mention feelings the way you mention physical health: tiredness, stress, a hard week. A film, a news story or something at school can be an easy way in.

Pick the moment

• Side by side works better than face to face: in the car, cooking, walking the dog.
• Avoid starting when either of you is rushed, angry or tired.
• Keep it short; you can come back to it.

Things you can say

• "Everyone has weeks when their head feels heavy. How has yours been?"
• "You don't have to have it figured out to talk to me."
• "If a friend was struggling, would you know who to tell?"

Listen first

Resist the urge to fix or reassure straight away. Reflect back what you hear, thank them for telling you, and ask what would help. If something worries you, stay calm and seek advice.

More questions from parents ask

• My teenager says "I'm fine" - what should I do?
• Signs of depression in teenagers: what parents should notice
• How to talk to an anxious teenager
• All guides